I suck with friendships.
Let me just ramble a bit.
I am a total homebody. I like just sitting at home and relaxing when I have time, which feels like not often. I like just doing nothing, and not having to carry on a conversation, or get out and see somebody.
I hate talking on the phone. I always have. If I'm going to speak with someone, I 'd really prefer it face to face. When you're on the phone with someone, its different than being in the presence of a friend. If you're with a friend, you can just sit there and not talk. But if you're on the phone, you really can't do a whole lot of not talking, so there has to be specific things you need to talk about, or you should just really get off the phone. I mean, thats how I feel. So I mostly never talk to my friends back home.
I like chatting online with my friends. Because you can do so at a leisurely pace. Its much different than talking on the phone.
I think thats all for now. That was a lame post.
6 Comments:
so thats why you ALWAYS talk to me (at andrew, andrew relays it) over the phone?!
was this your attempt to break up with me? because i will not allow it.
no worries, i'm not breaking up with anyone. haha
haha and mel...i mean...its not like i call you up and am like, so melissa...how are you feeling lately? whats going on in your life? i dont' do that. i suck at that.
I'm really bad with this... always have been. But having a baby makes me 100% more sucky at it. :( I LOVE spending time with people. Like, seriously, I would have visitors in and out of my home 24/7 if I had any friends here. LOL. But I HATE HATE HATE talking on the phone.. because, as I'm sure Katie Jo can attest to, I hate having silence on the phone. It makes me feel so freakin weird. But I love silence in one-on-one conversation. I think there's something really beautiful about that, actually.
I am totally with you on the phone deal. I do enjoy having people come over and hang out, but I want that sense of comfort where I don't have to feel like I have to have something specific for my company to do. i dont' want to feel like i have to "entertain" them. It is also hard having girls over to my apt because andrew is pretty much always there, and when he is, he is either studying really hard/working on a sermon, or he wants to watch tv in peace or something and not have a bunch of girls in a close space. which is completely understandable. i wouldn't want him to parade his guy friends over in the middle of our living room which is the only place for me to relax/be, anyway. my point is...what is my point? i want to sit in my pajamas with my hair in a scrunchie and stare blankly at the tv and laugh and then talk with my friends when i have them over. I was that way with my friend Becky, whom I'm talked about, but she moved away. Its really hard for me to feel like I can justify inviting someone over to basically do nothing but just be. i dunno. its hard to find that comfort in people, at least for me. doing "normal" activities like having people over for dinner is out of the question, because of our lack of income....i would love to be able to have people over to eat because thats something I enjoy.
anyway....thats all.
Good for people to know.
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